My son Michael was given a pretty interesting project to work on this week. His third grade teacher sent him home with a Penny Project.
The idea is to find a penny for every year you've been alive. Then you are instructed to write a short description of something important that happened to you that year. I thought it would be fun include Michael's list today.
1999: I was born at St. Louise Hospital in Morgan Hill at 7:30am.
2000: My family and I moved to an apartment in Turlock, California. I learned to walk and talk in my apartment.
2001: I cracked my head open on Mother's Day and had to get stitches! When they sowed me up it hurt very badly!
2002: My baby sister was born. Her name is Makayla Morgan Reese.
2003: I started soccer, but refused to play in the first four games. I also started kindergarten.
2004: I went to Boomers for my 5Th Birthday. Every time I went on the go-carts, I won.
2005: We got a swimming pool and a hot tub. I learned to swim in that year.
2006: We went to Six Flags Marine World. I also got my very first Shit-Tzu named Ginger.
2007: I played in Little League. I also went to Great America.
His use of language is just adorable! It was kind of a fun exercise - I enjoyed seeing what was most important to him. Of course, Mark and I had to coach him a little. He couldn't remember any of those events without a reminder.
I started wondering what something like that would look like if I gave it a try. What about instead of pennys and years, I documented every encounter with God? How many reminders would I need? (Quite a few I am guessing.) Would I record something once a year, or once every few minutes? What would I want to say? Would God be pleased with what is most important to me?
My friend Michele left a comment on my blog from the other day, describing what God means to her. If you get a chance, I encourage you to take a look. Michele is obviously in the habit of recording those God moments. What a wonderful habit to pick up.
So here's a penny for your thoughts . . .
. . . each one including Christ - is worth its weight in gold.
Saturday, October 20
Friday, October 19
Shift
Mark and I had the privilege of participating in some leadership training today. It was a wonderful day of reflection, and I sensed the Holy Spirit challenge me to take a new step.
This step would be absolutely revolutionary. It seems so completely crazy - I mean . . . everyone would think I was nuts. It is so absurd, that I haven't even said it out loud yet. I've been mulling it over in my mind for a while now, and God sent one confirmation after another today - indicating the shift.
Something the speaker suggested as we parted today, went like this: "As you step back into your home or workplace, say nothing for a while."
I nodded my head in agreement. Nothing . . . yes, I will continue to keep my mouth closed (for now anyway). See, I have no plan. God very rarely provides me with a safe and structured A to Z. Instead, He usually gets my attention one way, only to draw me round the back, or upside down, or inside out . . . you getting the picture? And this time, He is touching the very deepest part of my heart in a way that I can't ignore.
I tend to over analyse things (some of you already know that about me). There were moments in there today, mostly during worship, where I sensed God's absolute approval of this decision. There was nothing complicated about that. God spoke, I heard, and my heart was eager to obey. I could almost hear Him say, "Yes, this is the direction I want you to go. This particular thing doesn't feel like it fits any more -- because it doesn't."
But somehow the purity of that moment faded with the music. Reality hit as my tush hit the pew . . . and suddenly I wasn't feeling so brave anymore. Chicken even? Yes, chicken would be a great description. But through this sense of dread - I still hear the call.
This post may seem very vague, but that is because I am not ready to take the outward step. But inside my whole body shakes with anticipation, as my feet are pointed in the direction of danger. God is calling me to my next cliff - and the jump will take an incredible amount of wisdom and courage.
Has God ever shifted things on you? Just when you think you are going in one direction, He suddenly picks up and moves another way? I've experienced this a lot in my Christian walk. Just when I try and put God into some kind of a box - He climbs right out. It is the strangest thing.
It would be so much safer to just stay put. "Why rock the boat?" one might ask. But when you are a follower of Jesus Christ, and when love rules your heart, the truth of the matter is - you are not the one causing the shift in things. God and God alone calls the shots.
Following Christ is never a safe guarantee. But with every choice to disobey, my heart shrivels and God's Spirit is grieved.
I choose to wait quietly for the appointed moment . . . and chicken or not - I'm gonna jump.
This step would be absolutely revolutionary. It seems so completely crazy - I mean . . . everyone would think I was nuts. It is so absurd, that I haven't even said it out loud yet. I've been mulling it over in my mind for a while now, and God sent one confirmation after another today - indicating the shift.
Something the speaker suggested as we parted today, went like this: "As you step back into your home or workplace, say nothing for a while."
I nodded my head in agreement. Nothing . . . yes, I will continue to keep my mouth closed (for now anyway). See, I have no plan. God very rarely provides me with a safe and structured A to Z. Instead, He usually gets my attention one way, only to draw me round the back, or upside down, or inside out . . . you getting the picture? And this time, He is touching the very deepest part of my heart in a way that I can't ignore.
I tend to over analyse things (some of you already know that about me). There were moments in there today, mostly during worship, where I sensed God's absolute approval of this decision. There was nothing complicated about that. God spoke, I heard, and my heart was eager to obey. I could almost hear Him say, "Yes, this is the direction I want you to go. This particular thing doesn't feel like it fits any more -- because it doesn't."
But somehow the purity of that moment faded with the music. Reality hit as my tush hit the pew . . . and suddenly I wasn't feeling so brave anymore. Chicken even? Yes, chicken would be a great description. But through this sense of dread - I still hear the call.
This post may seem very vague, but that is because I am not ready to take the outward step. But inside my whole body shakes with anticipation, as my feet are pointed in the direction of danger. God is calling me to my next cliff - and the jump will take an incredible amount of wisdom and courage.
Has God ever shifted things on you? Just when you think you are going in one direction, He suddenly picks up and moves another way? I've experienced this a lot in my Christian walk. Just when I try and put God into some kind of a box - He climbs right out. It is the strangest thing.
It would be so much safer to just stay put. "Why rock the boat?" one might ask. But when you are a follower of Jesus Christ, and when love rules your heart, the truth of the matter is - you are not the one causing the shift in things. God and God alone calls the shots.
Following Christ is never a safe guarantee. But with every choice to disobey, my heart shrivels and God's Spirit is grieved.
I choose to wait quietly for the appointed moment . . . and chicken or not - I'm gonna jump.
Thursday, October 18
Question
Tonight's post consists of a question. I got it from my cousin Jodie, as she asked her Awana kids this the other night.
Who is God to you?
I'd love to hear your answer . . . and I'd bet that God would too.
Who is God to you?
I'd love to hear your answer . . . and I'd bet that God would too.
Wednesday, October 17
Seventeen
Seventeen years ago, on October the 17th, my eyes landed on the one who would steal my heart away. The father of my children, the holder of my dreams . . . my Bear.
It was a Wednesday night, and I had just come home from a strenuous afternoon of ballet. I used to drive all the way to 13th Street in San Jose for lessons. That was approximately 40 miles away. It was well worth the drive, being part of the San Jose Dance Theatre was like a dream!
The Nutcracker was due to roll in soon, so I'm pretty sure that we were practicing for that. Hours upon hours of rehearsal led up to the show. This particular Wednesday, I remember feeling pretty tired after I made it home. The phone call that butted in at about 9pm was met with a sigh.
My friend Gloria and her sisters wanted to take me out. Now back in the day, this meant out to a club - and Wednesday nights happened to be Sandrinos night. My first response was, "no way" as I just wanted to shower and slip into bed, forgetting that I was alive. In this particular season, I was moving through a terrible patch of heartbreak, grieving the death of a loved one.
After more coercing, fun finally won - and I hurried myself over to their house. Three sisters, Gloria, Juanita and Raquel worked to get me ready. Their mother used to call me her white daughter, and I felt very much like a part of the family. They were taking me out for a night on the town. Little did I know, my whole life was about to change forever.
As we sat in Sandrinos, the same heartbreaking music pounded . . . some of the same people were walking around. The smell of dry ice and the glare of the lights was more than this heart bear. Then, I saw him. I will never forget the first time I layed eyes on Mark. Something inside of me leaped, and suddenly I was a little bit more into the club scene.
He waltzed into the place with one of his friends. I could see nobody else. I was curious about this suave looking guy. Who was he, and where had he been all my life? It turned out that Mark knew some of the people I was with.
"Introduce me", I remember whispering to Raquel.
After a few dances, and a night of getting to know each other a bit . . . we headed out to the car. Coincidentally, his buddy ditched him - leaving Mark without a ride home. So being the sap that I am, I told him to climb in, and I proceeded to take him home.
I remember every detail of that night. What I was wearing, what it felt like to step into his parent's house for the very first time. I remember the T-shirt he lend me . . . and I remember hoping that he would be "the one".
I fall more and more in love with that man every day. He has been my constant - my comfort and the love of my life. He gives so selflessly, he is really funny, easy to be around, a good listener and a wonderful father. Mark loves me for me. I could not ask for a better partner. God has far exceeded all of my dreams.
Bear and Bee . . . we celebrate this special day together - forever.
It was a Wednesday night, and I had just come home from a strenuous afternoon of ballet. I used to drive all the way to 13th Street in San Jose for lessons. That was approximately 40 miles away. It was well worth the drive, being part of the San Jose Dance Theatre was like a dream!
The Nutcracker was due to roll in soon, so I'm pretty sure that we were practicing for that. Hours upon hours of rehearsal led up to the show. This particular Wednesday, I remember feeling pretty tired after I made it home. The phone call that butted in at about 9pm was met with a sigh.
My friend Gloria and her sisters wanted to take me out. Now back in the day, this meant out to a club - and Wednesday nights happened to be Sandrinos night. My first response was, "no way" as I just wanted to shower and slip into bed, forgetting that I was alive. In this particular season, I was moving through a terrible patch of heartbreak, grieving the death of a loved one.
After more coercing, fun finally won - and I hurried myself over to their house. Three sisters, Gloria, Juanita and Raquel worked to get me ready. Their mother used to call me her white daughter, and I felt very much like a part of the family. They were taking me out for a night on the town. Little did I know, my whole life was about to change forever.
As we sat in Sandrinos, the same heartbreaking music pounded . . . some of the same people were walking around. The smell of dry ice and the glare of the lights was more than this heart bear. Then, I saw him. I will never forget the first time I layed eyes on Mark. Something inside of me leaped, and suddenly I was a little bit more into the club scene.
He waltzed into the place with one of his friends. I could see nobody else. I was curious about this suave looking guy. Who was he, and where had he been all my life? It turned out that Mark knew some of the people I was with.
"Introduce me", I remember whispering to Raquel.
After a few dances, and a night of getting to know each other a bit . . . we headed out to the car. Coincidentally, his buddy ditched him - leaving Mark without a ride home. So being the sap that I am, I told him to climb in, and I proceeded to take him home.
I remember every detail of that night. What I was wearing, what it felt like to step into his parent's house for the very first time. I remember the T-shirt he lend me . . . and I remember hoping that he would be "the one".
I fall more and more in love with that man every day. He has been my constant - my comfort and the love of my life. He gives so selflessly, he is really funny, easy to be around, a good listener and a wonderful father. Mark loves me for me. I could not ask for a better partner. God has far exceeded all of my dreams.
Bear and Bee . . . we celebrate this special day together - forever.
Tuesday, October 16
Echo
My Dad called me tonight . . . and there was this echo in the phone. This made communication really difficult. He would speak and I would respond, and after a couple of seconds, I would hear my own voice echo back to me.
This is not a pretty thing. I already have a phone timing challenge - as I will a lot of times find myself stepping on toes while trying to carry on a phone conversation. I will either speak too soon or wait too long, and the communication gets all garbled.
It's kind of like when you are walking towards somebody, and then both of you choose to move in the same direction, trying to get out of one another's way - only to block each other. Then there is this awkward apology, as you either stand still or continue the same rhythm. This phone charade is the same kind of thing.
After tolerating the echo for a few sentences, I asked my Dad to call me back. After a minute or two he was back on the line without the echo.
"Much better," I said.
Hearing my own phone voice was kind of annoying . . . the person I really wanted to hear was my Dad. His laughter, his responses - not my own.
I got to thinking about how communicating with somebody can sometimes get all twisted up. As I sometimes try and interject my point of view, I will awkwardly try and move from one side to the other, and eventually an impasse occurs. Have I really heard what the other person said, or am I listening to the echo of my own point of view?
I am going to think about that one for a while. Being a true friend sometimes means setting your selfishness aside to care for the needs of someone else. That can mean letting go of my need to be heard, and all of my own interests - even my own hurts.
I'd like to add, that letting go of hurts is not an easy thing. When we've been wounded, there is a part of us that wants to be validated - and for things to somehow be made right. But as I have walked along side of God through some pretty rough communication patches - He is teaching me that the "making things right" is all up to Him.
Lord, help me to be a better communicator - a better friend. May the echo of my selfishness be drowned out, as I strain to hear the heart of another. I long to be a better listener . . .
so that when I do bump into another - love prevails.
This is not a pretty thing. I already have a phone timing challenge - as I will a lot of times find myself stepping on toes while trying to carry on a phone conversation. I will either speak too soon or wait too long, and the communication gets all garbled.
It's kind of like when you are walking towards somebody, and then both of you choose to move in the same direction, trying to get out of one another's way - only to block each other. Then there is this awkward apology, as you either stand still or continue the same rhythm. This phone charade is the same kind of thing.
After tolerating the echo for a few sentences, I asked my Dad to call me back. After a minute or two he was back on the line without the echo.
"Much better," I said.
Hearing my own phone voice was kind of annoying . . . the person I really wanted to hear was my Dad. His laughter, his responses - not my own.
I got to thinking about how communicating with somebody can sometimes get all twisted up. As I sometimes try and interject my point of view, I will awkwardly try and move from one side to the other, and eventually an impasse occurs. Have I really heard what the other person said, or am I listening to the echo of my own point of view?
I am going to think about that one for a while. Being a true friend sometimes means setting your selfishness aside to care for the needs of someone else. That can mean letting go of my need to be heard, and all of my own interests - even my own hurts.
I'd like to add, that letting go of hurts is not an easy thing. When we've been wounded, there is a part of us that wants to be validated - and for things to somehow be made right. But as I have walked along side of God through some pretty rough communication patches - He is teaching me that the "making things right" is all up to Him.
Lord, help me to be a better communicator - a better friend. May the echo of my selfishness be drowned out, as I strain to hear the heart of another. I long to be a better listener . . .
so that when I do bump into another - love prevails.
Monday, October 15
Productive
Today's blog will have to be a quick one. I am off to a leadership meeting in a few minutes, and I really don't think I will have much juice left after I get home.
I enjoyed a wonderful day of productivity . . . this might not seem like a big deal to some, but for me, having a productive day is bliss.
Many of the projects I am in charge of at work were all taken care of today - on Monday! I don't know if it is because I am getting a little bit more of a groove going, or if it had to do with less interruptions. Maybe the fact that I didn't have to leave to pick Makayla up in the middle of the afternoon helped.
Whatever it was, or whoever "He was" I should say . . . . God's company was a wonderful comfort.
I was wired to work . . . that is something I am discovering about myself through this experience. When I am contributing to the productivity and well being of a team - I really feel in my element. I don't have to be the one out front, in fact - being behind the scenes is a refreshing change.
As I wrap up another day, my prayer continues to be the same.
. . . Lord, use me as You see fit.
I enjoyed a wonderful day of productivity . . . this might not seem like a big deal to some, but for me, having a productive day is bliss.
Many of the projects I am in charge of at work were all taken care of today - on Monday! I don't know if it is because I am getting a little bit more of a groove going, or if it had to do with less interruptions. Maybe the fact that I didn't have to leave to pick Makayla up in the middle of the afternoon helped.
Whatever it was, or whoever "He was" I should say . . . . God's company was a wonderful comfort.
I was wired to work . . . that is something I am discovering about myself through this experience. When I am contributing to the productivity and well being of a team - I really feel in my element. I don't have to be the one out front, in fact - being behind the scenes is a refreshing change.
As I wrap up another day, my prayer continues to be the same.
. . . Lord, use me as You see fit.
Sunday, October 14
Metal
A trip to Target this afternoon brought me a real pain in the thumb. No, thumb was not a typo, although I guess that is kind of a strange thing to say. I'll explain.
My kids love to dress up for Halloween - the little ones do anyway. With Matthew turning eleven this year, he is really not so much into costumes as much anymore. His costume for this year will consist of a name tag with the name "Matthew" written on it. He has decided to go as himself. I guess we will have to wait and see if he gets any candy.
As we pulled into the Halloween aisle at Target, I grabbed the cart to move forward a little, and I felt a sharp pain in my thumb. Blood began to pour as I tried to collect my thoughts. Pain and blood . . . this can't be good. I looked back at the cart to try and find what was so sharp - but there was really nothing there. Hmmm . . . just an area on the metal that had some uneven parts - could that have been what butchered my finger?
Blood continued to pour down my hand, and while I squeezed my thumb it managed to get all over then other hand too. I asked a Target associate for a band-aid. It seemed like an eternity before she returned. By this time, there was blood on the floor, and all over my hands. I felt a bit faint.
After removing some of the red stuff, I could see that a piece of metal was lodged in my finger. Great, I thought. Hospital . . . needles . . . my head began to spin. I thought about how I would get there, and if I would need to get a Tetnis shot. Ouch!!
I was led to the employee bathroom, where I proceeded to wash my hands and work on getting the object out. A sterile pair of tweezers was handed to me, and I worked on my thumb for a good five minutes. My hopes began to drop, with thoughts of waiting rooms and stitches.
I decided to give it one more tug, and out came the shared piece of metal. I said a praise to God, and we all had a celebration in the bathroom. We even talked to the tiny piece of metal like it was alive or something.
After I was all bandaged up, I was escorted into one of the manager's offices to fill out some paperwork. I'm sure it had to do with the possibility of a lawsuit or something. After we finished with the paperwork, we headed back to gory alley.
After we finished our purchases, I stopped by Steph's house to have her take a look. She is the physician in our family. Any time I have any kind of a medical question, I always call on Steph. She fixed me up with some beta dyne, and after a short visit we were on our way.
I type tonight with a thumb all wrapped in gauze. Stephanie's advice was to keep an eye on my finger, and go and get a shot if it appears to be the slightest bit infected.
Quite an eventful trip to Target this afternoon. I thought it would be fun to make the Halloween aisle a little bit more gory I guess. I was so grateful when that little piece of metal popped out. Praises poured out of my heart - praises of relief.
It's in the ordinary moments, big and small that God is watching. He cares about the deep and hidden wounds just as much as the visible blood spurting splinter type.
I felt very much loved by God through this little episode. God is also nurturing some bigger wounds on the inside tonight. It is such a comfort to know that He is always there.
My kids love to dress up for Halloween - the little ones do anyway. With Matthew turning eleven this year, he is really not so much into costumes as much anymore. His costume for this year will consist of a name tag with the name "Matthew" written on it. He has decided to go as himself. I guess we will have to wait and see if he gets any candy.
As we pulled into the Halloween aisle at Target, I grabbed the cart to move forward a little, and I felt a sharp pain in my thumb. Blood began to pour as I tried to collect my thoughts. Pain and blood . . . this can't be good. I looked back at the cart to try and find what was so sharp - but there was really nothing there. Hmmm . . . just an area on the metal that had some uneven parts - could that have been what butchered my finger?
Blood continued to pour down my hand, and while I squeezed my thumb it managed to get all over then other hand too. I asked a Target associate for a band-aid. It seemed like an eternity before she returned. By this time, there was blood on the floor, and all over my hands. I felt a bit faint.
After removing some of the red stuff, I could see that a piece of metal was lodged in my finger. Great, I thought. Hospital . . . needles . . . my head began to spin. I thought about how I would get there, and if I would need to get a Tetnis shot. Ouch!!
I was led to the employee bathroom, where I proceeded to wash my hands and work on getting the object out. A sterile pair of tweezers was handed to me, and I worked on my thumb for a good five minutes. My hopes began to drop, with thoughts of waiting rooms and stitches.
I decided to give it one more tug, and out came the shared piece of metal. I said a praise to God, and we all had a celebration in the bathroom. We even talked to the tiny piece of metal like it was alive or something.
After I was all bandaged up, I was escorted into one of the manager's offices to fill out some paperwork. I'm sure it had to do with the possibility of a lawsuit or something. After we finished with the paperwork, we headed back to gory alley.
After we finished our purchases, I stopped by Steph's house to have her take a look. She is the physician in our family. Any time I have any kind of a medical question, I always call on Steph. She fixed me up with some beta dyne, and after a short visit we were on our way.
I type tonight with a thumb all wrapped in gauze. Stephanie's advice was to keep an eye on my finger, and go and get a shot if it appears to be the slightest bit infected.
Quite an eventful trip to Target this afternoon. I thought it would be fun to make the Halloween aisle a little bit more gory I guess. I was so grateful when that little piece of metal popped out. Praises poured out of my heart - praises of relief.
It's in the ordinary moments, big and small that God is watching. He cares about the deep and hidden wounds just as much as the visible blood spurting splinter type.
I felt very much loved by God through this little episode. God is also nurturing some bigger wounds on the inside tonight. It is such a comfort to know that He is always there.
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