Shift

Mark and I had the privilege of participating in some leadership training today. It was a wonderful day of reflection, and I sensed the Holy Spirit challenge me to take a new step.

This step would be absolutely revolutionary. It seems so completely crazy - I mean . . . everyone would think I was nuts. It is so absurd, that I haven't even said it out loud yet. I've been mulling it over in my mind for a while now, and God sent one confirmation after another today - indicating the shift.

Something the speaker suggested as we parted today, went like this: "As you step back into your home or workplace, say nothing for a while."

I nodded my head in agreement. Nothing . . . yes, I will continue to keep my mouth closed (for now anyway). See, I have no plan. God very rarely provides me with a safe and structured A to Z. Instead, He usually gets my attention one way, only to draw me round the back, or upside down, or inside out . . . you getting the picture? And this time, He is touching the very deepest part of my heart in a way that I can't ignore.

I tend to over analyse things (some of you already know that about me). There were moments in there today, mostly during worship, where I sensed God's absolute approval of this decision. There was nothing complicated about that. God spoke, I heard, and my heart was eager to obey. I could almost hear Him say, "Yes, this is the direction I want you to go. This particular thing doesn't feel like it fits any more -- because it doesn't."

But somehow the purity of that moment faded with the music. Reality hit as my tush hit the pew . . . and suddenly I wasn't feeling so brave anymore. Chicken even? Yes, chicken would be a great description. But through this sense of dread - I still hear the call.

This post may seem very vague, but that is because I am not ready to take the outward step. But inside my whole body shakes with anticipation, as my feet are pointed in the direction of danger. God is calling me to my next cliff - and the jump will take an incredible amount of wisdom and courage.

Has God ever shifted things on you? Just when you think you are going in one direction, He suddenly picks up and moves another way? I've experienced this a lot in my Christian walk. Just when I try and put God into some kind of a box - He climbs right out. It is the strangest thing.

It would be so much safer to just stay put. "Why rock the boat?" one might ask. But when you are a follower of Jesus Christ, and when love rules your heart, the truth of the matter is - you are not the one causing the shift in things. God and God alone calls the shots.

Following Christ is never a safe guarantee. But with every choice to disobey, my heart shrivels and God's Spirit is grieved.

I choose to wait quietly for the appointed moment . . . and chicken or not - I'm gonna jump.