"A little to the left, now the right. No, up . . . then down. Tweak the color a little - now change it back." This has been my inner dialogue while creating a masterful website. Wanting to get it perfect has me working far too long on a project that really needs to be checked off. Excellence is something wonderful to strive for, when perfection becomes my focus, I find myself tipping the scale of insanity.
My pursuit of perfection can get me so twisted up. I find it in hundreds of places throughout my day, from getting my hair to cooperate to getting my kids to cooperate. Getting the beds made perfectly, working to edit a writing piece to death, to even feeling a failure in my relationships -- the underlying motivation is something I don't like to admit. I strive to keep things looking perfect because it gives me the illusion of being in control.
These perfectionist tendencies will often transfer over to my relationship with God. I strive for the perfect looking "quite time" and feel a failure if it doesn't look just right. Working to keep my heart pure, and my mind full of His precepts magnifies the untidiness of my heart.
As I learn to let go of my need to control through the avenue of perfection, I find that being true to myself is going to be messy. Relationships are rarely tidy and controllable - especially a relationship with the Living God.
A picture perfect snapshot of the beach shows miles of untouched and perfectly smooth sand. Personally, I prefer a photo with swirls of footprints side by side - God's and mine.
"Yes, right down the center . . . good. Now that's just right."
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