Born Leader

Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it. ~ Proverbs 22:6

It was twelve years ago today that I saw and held my son for the first time. His wiggly little body had become familiar from the inside during the months he was baking. Now the movements were felt from the outside. It was surreal.

I labored for hours, about sixteen to be exact. An epidural brought some relief, but because only half of my body responded, I felt every contraction on my left side. Mark watched the contraction monitor, and tried to prepare me at the lines went up. With each crescendo of consuming pain, it was all I could do to breath through the waves.

After what seemed like an eternity, Matthew finally entered the world. He let out a dignified scream, and proceeded to grab the suction bulb right out of the doctor's hands. Now that my friends, is what you call a born leader! I can just imagine what he must have been thinking, after getting to know him these twelve years.

Hey, it is freezing out here. Where am I? Who is this guy in the white coat, is he the one who is in charge? Get that thing out of my face!

After cleaning him off, and handing my husband a tissue to dry the lake on his face, they placed this brand new life on my lap. I held my son. A boy. We did not know the sex of the baby before hand, which made the surprise so sweet.

Those first days home were so difficult. Colic kept Matthew up at all hours of the night, leaving us feeling frazzled and ill-equipped. But as the months wore on, it got easier in some ways and harder in others. Even today, all these years later, raising two sons and a daughter is our greatest joy and our greatest challenge.

My little blond haired cutie is what brought this hard-hearted young mom back to church. It had been years since I stepped foot into a sanctuary full of spirit filled believers. Being angry at God for half of a decade, I really didn't want anything to do with church. But my whole perspective changed when Matthew was born. Mark and I wanted the best for him, and raising him in church seemed like it would be best.

I have a great relationship with my son all of these years later. He is intelligent, loving, and extremely funny. He is one of my favorite people in the whole world! His faith is strong, his commitment to God unwavering. I see great things for this born leader.

My heart swells with pride as I watch my Matthew grow. May God always instill in Him, what is best.

Happy Birthday son. Daddy and I love you so.

Team Building

Show proper respect to everyone: Love the brotherhood of believers, fear God, honor the King. ~ 1 Peter 2:16-18

It was years ago that I began picking up these little nuggets. Bits of wisdom about the recruiting process. That God would use me to recruit anybody is still a mystery.

My neighbor Iona and I sat facing each other at her kitchen table. I had pen and paper in hand as I shot questions in her direction. I had asked her if I could practice on her, hoping to get better at this recruiting thing. I was a Mary Kay Beauty consultant all of those years ago, and after excelling in sales I wanted to take it a step further and begin building my team.

After I finished my formal interview, she said something to me that I will never forget.

"It doesn't seem like you are very excited about what you are doing."

Ouch. I remember feeling blindsided by her comment, although her honesty is just what this beauty consultant needed. As much as I had talked myself into the fact that making women feel beautiful was important to me -- the "sales" side of it was never a good fit for this heart.

Shortly after that eye-opening encounter, I decided to step away from selling Mary Kay altogether. I couldn't stand the idea of building relationships on the basis of sales. My conscience wouldn't allow it.  Being in sales is not a bad thing, many folks bring in extra income this way.  But for me, my heart could not find rest.  

Years later, as I have stepped into various leadership roles at the church, the issue of recruitment has become part of my job responsibilities once again. At first, I cringed at the thought. I had never been any good at it before, what made me think I would be any better under this new title?

But something amazing happened on the inside of this knee shaking soldier. One by one, God began building teams under my leadership. It started small, and before I knew it, God had used me to recruit a team of over twenty women. I have never for a moment felt the need to take the credit. God and I both know where the power came from.

Today I look at a dream team of women that God used me to gather for Women's Ministries. I do not say this to pat myself on the back - it really was His doing, but to share the miracle with any of you out there who might still be loathing the idea of recruiting.

I'd like to share some of the things I've learned through the years. They have brought me much success. These steps have sharpened me as a leader, and have trained me to fully depend on the Lord for team building.

1. Pray. Ask God who He wants to have join your team. Aside from helping you reach your vision, God wants to grow this individual in leaps and bounds. He wants to use you to help them take that next step.

2.Watch. Take note of individuals God brings across your path. Who has proven to be reliable? Trustworthy? Punctual and hard working?

3. Plan. Put the job description in writing so that the other person will know what is expected.

4. Approach. Time to put yourself out there. Set a date for lunch or coffee. Be honest in why you have approached this person. Give them time to think in over and pray, but set a deadline on when they should get back to you.

5. Listen. God will often times connect a need with a person ready to fill it. The trick is to be listening. This happens all the time. God can use you to bridge the gap!

Above all, believe in what you are selling -- with all your heart. If you have any hesitation about where you find yourself, do not make the mistake of inviting others to come along.

Happy recruiting, and remember . . . God will do the work through you. Step aside, and embrace the wonder of team building. Believe in yourself, and in every person He has you tap on the shoulder.

God already does.

Toast

Wisdom is supreme, therefore get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding. ~ Proverbs 4:7

I was asked to give a toast at my sister's wedding this summer. The idea thrilled me and scared me half out of my mind, all at the same time.

There I stood, in front of a crowd I only half knew (my sister's half), I spoke blessing and provision from the heart. Feeling unpolished and a little bit unprepared, I loved the whole experience, knowing that although I was a little bit rusty - this is what I was made for.

Stepping into a brand new world yesterday, and for the very first time, I took my seat at the Toasmaster's table. There were eight of us, all ready at a moment's notice to stand up and give a speech. I felt mesmerized, as the Toasmaster of the afternoon took the ball and ran, getting everybody to participate - even the guest, which happened to be yours truly. It was a solid hour of adrenaline, and I couldn't have had more fun.

Pursuing a writing a speaking ministry is what landed me in that chair yesterday afternoon. I've always held on to the dream of speaking in front of large crowds -- and to discover that there is a club that polishes those skills seemed out of this world! People very different from me, from all walks of life, sharing the same goal. To know what you want to say, and to deliver it with clarity and class. Wow.

Formality and structure carried our meeting, allowing much to be accomplished. As a guest, I was treated with kindness, but was expected to jump right in. Challenge being the catalyst to the group, I learned early on that this was no spectator sport. I was up for the challenge, and felt very comfortable jumping right in.

I truly believe that every person God has created, has been given a sweet spot. There is something each of us has been given to accomplish here on earth - something that we have been gifted in - something that we lose track of time doing.

What is that one thing for you? Maybe you enjoy gardening, taking care of children or typing in numbers. Do you lose track of time while drawing, chatting with a friend or cooking for your family?

For me, it is speaking and writing. I don't really know why God has put this burning desire in my heart to impart truth to others, but I am honored that He has. I can't be certain that I know what will come of this Toastmaster's membership. It may never go further than a group of eight . . . and that would be okay.

A room with a handful of people ready to listen, people to pour into, seeds to plant. I have so much still to learn, and I look forward to seeing what every member will teach me. What joy. Who would have thought that a group that makes such a big deal about a piece of toast would be just my kind of thing?

I encourage you today. If you have been able to pinpoint that sweet spot inside of you - pursuit it wholeheartedly! It may cost you everything, but selling out should never be an option.

I end today with a toast. To all of those dreamers out there - as you reach for the stars . . .

Make God your pursuit.

Winning Goal

. . . if it is leadership, let him govern diligently, ~ Romans 12:8b

All eighteen eyeballs were fixed on me. Fidgety little bodies, geared up for the game ahead. I sat on the bag that held goalie gloves to keep my pants from soaking through.

Struggling to find words, I worked to keep their attention. We talked about game strategies, Halloween costumes, grandma and grandpa's . . . I felt awkward and out of place. Loving on a bunch of kids shouldn't be so hard, should it? When my focus is on me instead of Christ, every attempt at leadership is an un-scorable goal.

Taking the place of a servant through ministry several years ago, God decided to promote me to leadership. Me. I sent this question heavenward often, "Are you sure Lord?" Going from nursery helper, to classroom leader, to nursery supervisor was quite an experience. Being "in charge" of anything kept me on my face before Him.

After a year or so, I was given the opportunity to lead the Crisis Care ministry. This proved to be a wild ride of obedience and surrender, from the moment I came on, till the season came when it was time to step away.

Next, I was on to Women's Ministries Director, something I still have a hard time wrapping my mind around. There were many days I just couldn't figure out for the life of me how I got there.

So why would a seasoned leader be afraid of a handful of four and five year olds? A couple of reasons come to mind. One is comparison. My cousin Jodie is awesome with the kids. She has a natural knack for getting them to listen. Her instructions are clear and oozing with love.

But for this particular game, Jodie wasn't there. Being coach's assistant, all eyes fell on me. Following in her footsteps felt a little bit intimidating. But as the game wore on, I decided to embrace the soccer coach God put on the inside of me - different from Jodie, but still okay.

Comparison kills. I would venture to say that it is the leading cause of death among ministry, especially for those God calls into leadership. When we are given the privilege of leading a group, so much of our hearts and souls get deposited. For people who have had their hearts squashed through the years, putting yourself out there can be a terrifying thing.

Saturday's game taught me a lot. As the rain came pouring down in the second half, I felt proud of the team that had been entrusted to me. With one injury, lots untied shoes and four goals, the purple team (otherwise known as the Sharks) had much to celebrate.

Every player from sweeper to goalie had been challenged to take a step outside of their comfort zone - all for the sake of the team. Same was true for this group's fearless leader. Working to acquire the fancy footwork of leadership, I welcome opportunities to be in charge, all for the sake of shinning God's light.

While acquiring leadership skills and being confident of your calling are important, shooting for love should always be every leader's greatest aim.